We often forget, in our passing days, the fragility of life. That tomorrow may never come, and that there are things that we had just wished we had done. The next time I want to say caring words to somebody, I know I should. When a friend calls to chat about life, I'll lend a listening ear. When I'm arguing with someone, I should be slow to show anger.
I don't want to be stuck not having the courage to live life, or being ignorant to these things.
There is no need to spend life on autopilot.
Most of us seem to think that things are going to change someday, all by themselves. But they usually don't. We need to make these changes for ourselves. Mould our lives the way we want to live them. It is pointless to run through the motions of life like you have unlimited time. You never know when you'll get that realization that you don't, or that phone call that tells you that you're running out of all this time that you thought you had.
Someday you'll have a sudden realization that things don't always work the way you expect them to and suddenly you're aware that many things are out of whack.
It doesn't make any sense to live in thought everyday, failing to back up your thoughts, dreams and plans with any action. Any action. Life is short and time is fleeting.
I would rather enjoy life and what it and the world have to offer to me.
To be honest, the thought kind of scares me, but what scares me more, is knowing that I didn't even try. I've lost so many people in my life and the only one I can think of that probably didn't have any regrets is my Papa. But he knew it was coming, even if he didn't share this with anybody until years later, near the end. When I go back and look at his life you can pinpoint exactly when he knew, just by the way he changed his life.
He did alot of amazing things and I'm really proud to be able to say that. Now I know that I want to be just like that. I want to love somebody, the way he loved my Grandma, and the way he loved the rest of his family.
One thing that I remember most about him and her is that whenever they were next to each other, they held hands and they were always looking at each other, smiling, and looking into each other's eyes, almost as if there was some sort of secret that only the two of them knew.
I want that, so much. I feel like they were so lucky to have one another."I shall die of having lived."
I am so tired of wasting time. The question is: Do I have the courage to move forward, and live my life to the fullest?
Do any of us really; without a reason that we may deem worthy?
Living life to the fullest is waking up on Monday morning with no complaints. Knowing that you always deserve to laugh. It's doing what feels right no matter what. It's doing what you want to no matter how stupid you look.
It's about being yourself, because even if they can say you are doing other things wrong.. no one can tell you that you are doing that wrong.
So how do you do this?
How do you accomplish this, really?
Maybe it's different for everyone.
I can't say that money equals happiness for me. Money can't make me happy, but who am I to say that it really doesn't for someone else?
I want to live and love and be content. I love being able to smile everyday and having a reason to laugh. I want to have a plan and know that I'm accomplishing things that I've set out to do. At the same time I just want to live life and let it take me where it wants me to go.
I want to love without boundaries, without rules and "regulations." I want to feel that I don't need to hold back, that I can say and do things that make me happy, and that I can make others happy.
I don't wish for happiness because the meaning of happiness can change on a daily basis, it's never the same. I wish to be content, and know in my heart that this is what is right for me.I want to take all of the chances that I held back on and that I'm holding back on right now. I want to do everything, be everywhere and know that I'm doing everything in my power to live my life the way that I crave to.
I don't care that I don't know exactly what I want to do with my life. It changes all the time, and I am admittedly just waiting for the sign that may never come. The sign that "THIS is what I should be doing."
It changes all the time, and it's never consistent.
I want to write. I want to make a difference in people's lives. That is what I want to do, and it clearly does not point to any single career path. Not that I need it to, I know that I can always write on the side, and that makes me happy.
But how do I help other people? I don't know. Maybe I should continue what I'm doing and cousel people. Maybe I should continue what I'm doing and apply for a position with the OPP. Maybe I really should give up and just write?
Maybe, "it's not what you do in life (that makes it all worthwhile), it's who you do it with." (A valuable life lesson from Family Guy ;)
"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WooHoo, what a ride!"